All i do is just sit down and my eyes gets wet. I'm frustrated, frustrated by my life. By what my life is now.
What am i doing with my life? Where am i heading to? I've failed, failed every expectation, failed every opportunity, failed every hope, failed everyone. I tried to live my life, but now all i am doing is just sitting down and cry in my room. No one knows. Not even the people closest to me. They don't know and won't know what's going down deep inside on me. There's no one i can talk to. There's no one that can help. I call out to the name of Jesus, even that brought no change to me. What kind of a life am i in now? Helpless, useless, goaless, redundant, suffering, and no one is to be blame except me.
But then who could ever see? Who could ever know what i'm going through inside? No one! Not even the people closest to me! If i open up, no one understands, the suffocation inside of me. Yet, i cannot show it outside of me. I cannot show you how broken down i am. Who would understand? No one! All people think is this guy is just playing pity party, or he is just wanting attention. Ya, anything you say!!!!
It breaks my heart every single day to see everyone wakes up in the morning with great hope of what's coming and what to expect, as i have nothing in front of me. I'm just living everyday in this cage that i cannot show people. What is the point of living then? Am i wasting my time? What does life have for me? Everything i want seems to run out of my plans. I have no place to go, no where to turn to.
All i can do is just sit and cry everyday.
